ShortWaveRockin

Check out Slayer’s World Painted Blood cover. It’s 4 covers that make up this map. I hope I get North America. Let the pussies get Australia because it’s the only way they can win.

A long while back I wrote a post about all these music epiphanies hitting me at once in a long dramatic post about police brutatlity, kansas city and the beatles white album. Well, I forgot one. While I was in Missouri I found an Alan Sherman record as I was diggin thru my friend’s LPs. The album is called My Son, the Nut and its from 1963. The first track on side B is the very famous “Hello Mudah, Hello Fadduh (A Letter from Camp)” You know all the words already. Two tracks later is “Rat Fink.” Maybe its a well known fact that the Misfits did not write this song, but I had no idea. It gets better. Just now I was looking into Alan Sherman’s version and his is a parody of a song from 1950 by the fucking Ames Brothers. The original is called “Rag Mop.”

Witness the evolution:

Been listening to the discography of Shellac nonstop for three days now. Found a site online with the above picture and a list of 10 uses for Shellac. I don’t need to restore old hardware, nor do I own any old hardware, so I made my own list of uses. Try it, it might save your day.

1. Brings you closer to god

Prayer to God (1000 Hurts)

To the one true God above
Here is my prayer
Not the first you’ve heard, but the first I wrote
Not the first, but the others were a long time ago
There are two people here, and I want you to kill them

Her, she can go quietly, by disease or a blow
To the base of her neck
Where her necklaces close
Where her garments come together
Where I used to lay my face
That’s where you oughta kill her
In that particular place
Him, just fucking kill him, I don’t care if it hurts

Yes I do, I want it to,
Fucking kill him but first
Make him cry like a woman
No particular woman
Let him hold out hope that
Someone or other might come…
Then fucking kill him
Fucking kill him
Kill him already, kill him
Fucking kill him, fucking kill him
Kill him already, kill him
Fucking kill him, fucking kill him
Kill him already, kill him
Just fucking kill him!
Fucking kill him
Fucking kill him already, kill him
Ah Fucking kill him, fucking kill him…

Kill him already, kill him,
Kill him already
Kill him already
Kill him already
Kill him
Amen

2. Good for Initiating Fights

The Watch Song (1000 Hurts)

Hey man, I wanna have a fight with you
Regardless of my feelings on the subject
It appears that I am going to
Forget about the fight
Forget about it
I’ve paid more than anyone would advise for this watch
And so far I am disappointed in it
It beeps at me at noon, seven and five
And I can not turn off the piece of shit
Hey man, hey!
Hey man, I wanna have a fight with you
From the way that you behave it is clear to me
You would like to have one, too
Let’s stop dancing*
And do what we both came here to do
Hey man, hey!
Hey
Hey man
Hey man, hey!
Hey
Hey Man
I wanna have a fight with you
From the way that you behave it is clear to me
You would like to have one, too

3. Predict the Future

4. Study Guide for Geology Class

Song of the Minerals (at Action Park)

Nickeline
Halite
Cinnabar
Dolomide
Hornblende
Willemite
Feldspar
Galena

5. Style Hair

6. Turns past guitarists, current engineers into current guitarists occasionally

7. Cures Mental Illness

Steve Albini (Wesley Willis)

the next song is called steve albini
steve albini
you are my best friend
you are my rock and roller
you are my engineer
you can really rock into rush hour
steve albini (chorus)
you are a nice man
you saved for the bear shellac
you are my rock and roll musician
you can really whoop it up while whooping a horse’s ass keeper on the right track
steve albini
steve albini
steve albini
steve albini
you engineered the debut record for nirvana
you are the miracle mind’s touch
you are my favorite man with the midas touch
you are on my side with the midas touch
steve albini (chorus)
rock over london; rock home chicago
holland furniture–you will like our style

8. Turns Words Backwards

Canada (Terraform)

We oughta name a song after you
Call it “Canada”
Imagine a country so blue
Backwards it’s adanaC

9. If ingested, can cause self hatred in songs

Song Against Itself (1000 Hurts)

This is the song against itself
It’s of two minds of its own
The discussion brought to logical conclusion
It follows through
But is not true
Who dares write a song against itself
Why do you act like you don’t know
What in the world I’m talking about?
It follows through
You have no clue
(I’ve already had it up with you)
(I’ve already had it up with you)
(I’ve already had it up with you)
(I’ve already had it up with you)
(I’ve already had it up with you)

10. Turns guitarists and bassists into drummers

- ADAM

The Beatles albums were all re released and "re mastered" (some would use quotes, the only album I’ve listened to has been The White Album (or Beatles to all you perfectionists out there) and it sounded pretty good to me) this week. It’s a big deal, supposedly. It’s something that fans have been screaming for since… well forever. The Stones did it, why didn’t The Beatles back then? It almost seems that when The Stones catalogue was re released The Beatles’ people thought to themselves "shit we should get on that." I only gather that from the re mastering process taking 4 years…it being 2009…that’s 2005… Stones reissues were 2002… maybe a few years passed out in between, that’s about right. All speculation of course. At least with the Stones they released the US and UK versions for us completists. I would have much preferred the US Rubber Soul and Revolver to the UK ones that were reissued, but I have to live with what was re released for now.

As Beatles day arrived (a day I thought of as Boredrum 9 until the Beatles had to go and steal all the thunder of 9/9/9) my dad said something that I’ve been mulling over since:

"These Beatles’ re releases can only signify the end of the album era."

They very well could be credited with creating it, so why not end it? Has the record company run out of everything possible? Is this a last grasp for air? People screamed about it, sure, but that never seemed to make any difference. And no digital release? Well that’s a little dated don’t you think? Force people out to look at all the new and great…re releases that are available. Why else would anyone go out there? We already know what the newest music is so why not tell us what old music you’d like us to buy. I saw that The Good Earth and Crazy Rhythms were re released as well. Albums that were originally issued on CD are now being re released on… CD. Double dipping seems to be the way to go, if the music industry is learning anything from the movie and DVD industry. But people aren’t as forgiving, and there are fewer special features to be found that aren’t floating around on some bootleg already. I totally forgot what I was talking about.

Ok I re read everything I wrote and I’m still not sure.

I guess it makes sense to not release it digitally yet, make this whole big deal about limited edition this and that so people run out and buy it. Never mind that you obviously have the tracks and could put the out for digital distribution, but then you can get them whenever you want and everyone could buy them, so where’s the business strategy in an unlimited amount of supply, right?

My Feelies CDs aren’t even worn out, how are they being re released? Maybe these new releases do sound better, if I pick them up I’ll let you know. And how many of these freaking 2 Disc releases of old albums do we need? I mean I’ve bought every Pavement reissue, and I’ll buy more if they come out, but still!

So The Beatles come back and are supposed to rule again despite the obvious handicap of two of them members being dead. This really is just grasping at what little straw there is left. I picked up The White Album because I heard great things about Revolution 9, and it really did sound amazing with the new mastering or whatever was done to it.

And another thing, where the fuck is Carnival of Lights???

I’m not planning on picking up any more of these Beatles releases, at least not in this wave. I’m sure they’ll be another one coming up again, probably a big hoopla for a Beatles only digital store somewhere, and maybe some other songs and versions of the songs. I’ll start grabbing for them then. It doesn’t make sense to hold onto these forever, these songs that are going to become public domain at some point anyway, and just horde them so no one will be able to buy them even though everyone wants to. Not that any of these industries are in the business of making sense. But I guess they better get to re re releasing them fast, because 12/12/12 is fast approaching and it’s going to be a long time to wait after that.

As for the disdain towards George Martin? I don’t like him, I think he’s a loser. You can make up your own mind on him.

So maybe I’m just on a Replacements kick but here is the greatest music video of all time for your viewing pleasure: Bastards of Young (off of Tim)

Replacements – Bastards Of Young – The top video clips of the week are here

buzzzz zzzzzzz zzzz zzzzzzzz zzz
zzzzzzzz zzzing zzz zzzz zzzzzz bzzzzz zzzzz
shhhh zzzz wehhhh zzzzzz zzzzz

During my bass research, I came across a few lists of best bassists, best basslines, best basses, etc. Stylus magazine has a top 50 basslines list. Some messageboards have nerds arguing if Jeremy by Pearl Jam is better than Money by Pink Floyd. Who really give a shit about those asswhipes. Do they even have bassists? Do they even have souls? Stylus has Mingus but not one Funkadelic bassline. I will put this childish debate I have been suck suckered into to rest with this list. It’s an addition to the Tigs list of Replacements lyrics, which should be at the top of the list of lists of all time.

Here are my top 10 basslines by any bassist who thumped away on the Parliament/Funkadelic planet. And the P-Funk planet of Thumpasorians could reign fire on this planet of Joy Divisons and Queens and Donna Summers. Suck it. Even Bernie Worrell’s synth bass beats your ass Fleetwood Mac.

Cosmic Slop (Funkadelic off Cosmic Slop) by Cordell Boogie Mosson

Music for my Mother (Funkadelic off Funkadelic) by Billy Bass Nelson

Wars of Armageddon (Funkadelic off Maggot Brain) by Billy Bass Nelson

One Nation Under a Groove (Funkadelic off One Nation Under a Groove) by Bernie Worrell on bass synth

Mothership Connection (Parliament off Mothership Connection) by Bootsy Collins

Unfunky UFO (Parliament off Mothership Connection) by Bootsy Collins

Night of the Thumpasaurus People (Parliament off Mothership Connection) by Bootsy Collins

Flash Light (Parliament off Funkentelechy Vs. the Placebo Syndrome) by Bernie Worrell on Bass Synth

Funkentelechy (Parliament off Funkentelechy Vs. the Placebo Syndrome) by Bootsy Collins

Electro-cuties (Funkadelic off The Electric Spanking of War Babies) by Jimmie Ali

I do prefer the Japanese import of the Ghost Dog soundtrack to the US version, except for this song. The song is identical one both except the US version has an extended intro with Rza saying, “Grab you guuUuuUuUuUuUUuuuuun.” Priceless.
The song opens with a very smooth beat, one to meditate off of, with Rza in full form, aggressively rhyming, sometimes so much that the words lose borders. As the song progresses the beat becomes more aggressive, while still maintaining a state of meditation, while Rza polishes his lyrics, and takes a step back in time and slows it a bit. Just because they’re slower doesn’t mean that his vocals are any less powerful. He makes sure you can hear every bit of it, and if you happen to slip off the vocals to catch the beat it’s your own fault for missing the lyrics, but you cannot be blamed for wanting to ride the music to the end. And with my favorite video game reference in a song to date, there’s no wonder this makes the list. Sit down and listen, young grasshopper, there is much to be uncovered here.

“I hate music, it’s got too many notes!” – I Hate Music (Sorry Ma, Forgot to Take Out The Trash)

“Gimmie Noise! Gimmie Noise! Gimmie Noise! Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise Noise” – Gimmie Noise (Stink)

“I hate your answering machine.” – Answering Machine (Let it Be)

“The ones who love us best are the ones we’ll lay to rest, dnd visit their graves on holidays at best. The ones who love us least are the ones we’ll die to please. If it’s any consolation, I don’t begin to understand them.” Bastards of Young (Tim)

“Got the radio blasting, turn that shit off!” – Takin’ A Ride (Sorry Ma, Forgot to Take Out The Trash)

“Look me in the eye then, tell me I’m satisfied” – Unsatisfied (Let it Be)

“Kids won’t listen to what you’re sayin” – Kids Don’t Follow (Stink)

“Now, something meets Boy, and something meets Girl” – Androgynous (Let it Be)

“Absolution is out of the question” – Never Mind (Pleased to Meet Me)

“Bus stop! Bus stop! Bus stop! Bus stop! Bus stop! Anyway, I ain’t got no place else to go.” – Hanging Downtown (Sorry Ma, Forgot to Take Out The Trash)

“One more warning sound” – We’re Comin’ Out (Let it Be)

“Label wants a hit and we don’t give a shit” – Treatment Bound (Hootenanny)

“I’ll be home when I’m sleeping” – Can’t Hardly Wait (Pleased to Meet Me)

“Seen your video. The phony rock ‘n’ roll. We don’t want to know.” Seen Your Video (Let it Be)

“Ok…I’minlovewiththegirlwhoworksatthestorewhereI’mnothingbuta customer” – Customer (Sorry Ma, Forgot to Take Out The Trash)

I’m listening to the fIREHOSE discography this week. Only fIREHOSE. All week. Doing this, I discovered a promo CD Watt put out called Big Bottom Pow Wow. It’s got a few fIREHOSE leftover songs and in-between spiel about the bass. This is what’s written on the cover: Interchords featuring Mike Watt, Cris Kirkwood, Flea & Les Claypool (via phone) talking about bass and what it means today. You can listen here at corndogs. Kirkwood kinda flips out. To give you an idea of what they talk about, at one point they bring Don Quixote into the conversation and while Watt thinks Sancho is the bass to Quixote’s guitar, Kirkwood thinks its the donkey.
I was talking about bass with a guy that came into the library the other day. He played a Fender Jazz, American. He had a little gold Fender Jazz hanging from his neck. While I should have been working, I talked with him for a while in front of the music section. No bass books, only really bad guitar books. We talked about the bass and he had a very open mind about how it fits into any kind of music. There’s no right way, it seems to be an instrument that everyone’s trying to figure out. What is it supposed to do? You can’t just follow along with the guitar chords, but even he said sometimes that’s needed. You gotta find your moments. Other times, let the guitar keep up with you, you run the song. I think this is a very different approach to the bass than in the past, which is what Watt and the boys talked about on that CD 15 years ago.
The library has zero books on the history of the bass guitar and obviously not the  philosophy of bass, though it’s littered with guitar books. The bass gets no respect. I think a philosophy of the bass book would be a great book. I could collect different philosophies of the bass from different bassists in different genres, time periods.  Gather everyones personal bass histories. The idea of how the bass should be used has changed drastically in all different types of music from jazz to rock to even the electronic equivalent of the bass in techno/house/dance music. I’m going to do many different parts in this, but this is my study of the bass, beginning with myself and then looking at why I was given the freedom to choose my bass style. I’m at the apex I believe.

The Bass, Part 1: Adam Says Stupid Things

My experience with the bass goes back to middle school. One of my friends Greg played bass in the school jazz band. I had no idea what the fuck it was. I had never played an instrument other than my 6 week run at the trumpet and smashing on my mom’s piano and making beautiful noise after my sisters would stumble through the same ole songs again and again. I remember making fun of Greg for not playing guitar. I called it a bass (pronounced like the fish). It was white with a white pick guard. When I watched the jazz band play in our gymnasium, I couldn’t hear anything he did, so I made fun of him some more.
Skip ahead to high school and again in a gymnasium. I was a sophomore. A bunch of seniors had a band the school let open a pep rally. As we left, this asshole kid, I don’t remember his name but he was hairy, said, “That guy can’t play bass. He was using a pick!”
I said, “Yea, you can’t do that!” trying to be cool.
He said, “So you play bass?”
I said, “No, but I know enough that you aren’t supposed to use a pick.”
Absolutely idiotic. To this point, I had seen one bass up close, Greg’s. My town didn’t have a music store. I had never even seen an electric guitar up close. The only bassists I knew were the guys in Korn, Limp Bizkit, Rage Against the Machine and Primus. I don’t think I paid close enough attention to the bassists in the videos to see if they used picks or not.
One year later. My friend Joe tells me he’s starting a band. He’s got a Gibson Les Paul (which I later dropped and cracked the neck) and I’ve got nothing. He tells me I’m the bass player. I need to get a bass. That Xmas I get my mom to buy me a bass. I think it was one of those Xmas/Birthday combo gifts I was good at negotiating. My birthday is 5 days after Jesus.
So I get a wood stained huge tanker of a thing with an amp. A knock off Fender P-bass. And it begins with me learning “Mudshovel” by Staind.

Don’t worry things get better. The bass songs that most influenced me most on my journey to now on the way. And no, I’m not going to post fucking Staind.