Where the Hell is my Start Menu?

Luddite? Shit no! Not anymore.

This is what its front of me———> it’s called an iMac

…and it’s scaring the shit out of me.  It’s so damn big.  Why is everything so easy to use?  And that’s not even the large looming question.  Here it is: why did it take so long?   I guess I can say money, but I should have just robbed and shot someone for theirs.  Peter’s got a nice little white macbook about 10 feet from me.  He’d have been an easy target.

Enough of that.

I’ve got one and I’m learning.  And it’s harder than you think.  Where’s my Start Menu?  I’m finding it hard to do simple things like listen to music or use common shortcuts.  What the fuck is this command key?  Command C, Command V???  I like it, but it’s one inch to the left of the control.  HUGE PROBLEM!  I’ve been on PCs since I was 7.  Since the first Gateway Family Home PC that filled up half our living room, and that was just the monitor.  We had the tower in the kitchen, we ate breakfast off it, all 5 of us.  I made a treefort out of the black and white cow box and it lasted 3 years!  Computers have really come a long way, and I’ve been ridin along with PCs the whole time.  It took practice, but I got to be damn good at PCs.  I knew the ins and outs.  I knew how to configure it for Internet, because I believe PCs weren’t made for internet until 2004, even though we had Prodigy in 1994.  Look at me.  I’m talking about PCs in the past tense.  Well, I guess now I’m part of this gestapo now.  I think I have to start wearing a scarf and listening to the Arcade Fire.  One step at a time.

First step is cancelling my brand new subscription to Rhapsody.  Shit.  Apparently you can’t have a mac and be part of that.

Back to the transition.  What does this have to do with music?  I’ll tell you.

This whole switch I’m making from PCs to apple is a lot like those bands that you know exist and you know are probably pretty damn good, but you don’t listen to them.  You refuse, and it takes work, deliberately avoiding contact with this “evil” you have created.  This has happened a few times to me.  Radiohead was my first.  I didn’t want any part of that laptopfakebullshit mmmcha music, then I heard in OK computer, 10 years after it came out!  The Grateful Dead are one for me.  I remember having a Grateful Dead shirt in the 5th grade to impress a girl, but I had never heard one song.  It never happened with the girl, so I always had a distaste for them, without ever listening.  My first full album was American Beauty only about 3 or 4 years ago and I listened to it all that week, 12 hours a day.

My point is go fuck yourself.  I really have no point.  I think I have changed over the years, but I still refuse bands over petty things like how they look, how their singles sound and who I know that listens to them and tells me about them.  There isn’t time to listen to them all, but sometimes you gotta give it a chance.  I wonder: How much else am I missing out on because I’m too much of a bastard to give in and try it?  Eh, its probably just cocaine and Wilco.